Let’s talk green flags with Alita Byrdon and Tinder

So you’ve matched and the vibe is off the charts – pang box office! You want to know where things are headed and if you have a genuine connection. By keeping an eye out for ‘green flags’, you can get a read of where it’s all going. Green flags are the healthy and promising signs a match gives to indicate they are a legitimately good person. When your date makes you feel comfortable and happy – green flag it!

Here’s some of the main green flags to look out for that would suggest you’re onto a winner.

They ask for your opinion
When you’re lining up a date, do they choose the location without asking if it suits you – or do they reach out and check what works? Touching base to make sure you’re chill with your date venue is a big green flag. Whether it’s confirming you can get there easily (knowing how heavy the traffic can get along EDSA) or making sure what you’re doing is going to be fun for you both – this classic green flag is a sign your match is thoughtful, considerate and worth the swipe™. Your opinion counts.

Have you checked out the photo verification feature on Tinder that helps you confirm your match is who they say they are by comparing profile photos with a series of posed photos taken in-app? Members who verify their profile get a blue tick and are more likely to get a match!

They make time for you
Young Filipinos are a busy bunch, juggling school, work, and side hustles at the same time. And while we all have careers, family and friends competing for our time – if you want to get to know each other, it takes some effort. Of a recent Tinder survey, 70% of respondents considered your date prioritising making time for you a green flag. The seconds and minutes that pass by on the clock are priceless – and it means something to have them spent on you!  It’s hard to establish a relationship – casual or more serious – without giving someone your full care and attention. You’re worth every moment!  

Before meeting for an IRL date, why not use Tinder’s Video Chat feature? It’s built with control and comfort and allows members to meet digitally, verify their match is genuine and better assess whether the chemistry is there before meeting face to face. For extra peace of mind, the feature is in-app only, meaning personal contact details are not shared.

They’re respectful to their exes
Time is ripe to retire the ungkatan ng past era. Watch out for any tales of the “crazy ex”, ika nga nila, past is past–mahirap ang may ‘exes baggage’!

So, hold the trash talk! While an ex might be someone your date would rather forget, they still need to be treated with respect. Watch how your match speaks about their former flames: is it with good manners and consideration? If so, wave that green flag! It’s a sign they’ll also treat you with dignity and care. This copybook alarm bell should give you an indication of how you could be treated in the future if things fizzle.

If your match says something that raises your eyebrows, you can report them from inside the chat. And if you don’t want to see your ex at all on Tinder, the Block Contacts feature allows members to input which of their contacts they’d rather not see, or not be seen by.  Whether those contacts are already on Tinder or decide to download it later using the same contact info, they won’t appear as a potential match. Whether members want to avoid a colleague or an ex, the feature gives them more control over their experience.

They’re comfortable talking about their feelings
It takes vulnerability to be open about how you feel – especially with a new match! Most survey respondents agree, with 73% believing that knowing how their date feels about them is a green flag. Even 61% of Pinoy young adult daters prefer to be open and upfront when it comes to talking about their feelings–so it’s absolutely alright to slowly put your guards down and speak from the heart.¹

So, if you’re too nervous to get the conversation started in person – it’s ok to send a message on Tinder to get the ball rolling. Be brave and take charge! Knowing where you stand can give you some indication about how much to invest in your match, and whether the connection is full flame or a burn out. Opting for a video call, especially Tinder’s video chat feature, is one way that you can still get comfortable with your date before meeting IRL and still determining whether or not there is a connection. Remember, ‘wag tayo sa paasa!  

They’re fair with money
Meeting up should be more fun than a financial burden – and making sure the date budget is balanced is a major green flag! Talking about money or paying on a date can feel awkward but a good match will keep their eye out – from little costs to big bills – to make sure everything is fair! Red flag warning: a bad date will line up expensive activities without your tick of approval, or a discussion on who’s paying. Also, make sure you never send money to a Tinder match – even if the person claims it is an emergency.

Did you know that Tinder’s Explore feature lets you match with people who have the same interests as you? With Explore, members have more control over who they meet by giving them the option to navigate through profiles arranged by interest, including foodies, music lovers, animal parents and thrill seekers.

They respect your boundaries
Your match needs to respect your boundaries – full stop. Look out for a date who listens to you when you say, ‘No’, and works with what makes you comfortable. Green flag friendly phrases include: “What works for you?”, “Does this make you comfortable?” and “Is it ok if I do this?” Questions are key to unlocking this green flag. The limits you set around your dating life are important and a good match will confidently check you’re feeling good! So, ‘wag maging marupok!

Did you know Tinder has an Are You Sure? feature? It serves as a real-time warning to think twice about an opening line. It uses AI to detect harmful language and proactively intervenes to warn the sender their message may be offensive, asking them to pause before hitting send. Are You Sure? is part of  the suite of harm reduction tools Tinder already has in place, including Does This Bother You?, which provides proactive support to members when harmful language is detected in a message they received.

When you’re dating, it’s important to look for both red flags and green go signs to suss out your date – and remember to always trust your gut. You have the power within you (and your swiping thumb) to build an amazing dating life! Grow your confidence by checking out the in-app Tinder Safety Centre and learn about the best ways to date safely, as well as some of Tinder’s green-flag related features such as Photo Verification, Block Contacts and Video Chat. While you can’t control the actions of others, the more familiar you are with dating dodgies, the more assertive you’ll feel in calling them out.

We hope the green flags wave for you! Mabuhay ang nagmamahal!

Green flags also exist in the form of three of Tinder’s safety features:

• Photo Verification – to ensure members are who they say they are
• Block Contacts – to avoid any colleagues or exes
• Video Chat – designed to facilitate a pre-IRL date that puts comfort first